An ‘un-social’ network

Posted: October 3, 2013 in blogging, Facebook, friendship

This is a short one.
‘What in the world is a social network’ is the title of the piece I read this morning. Rhetorical as it may sound, I really wonder how effective these sites really are. Some of them claim to bring you and your friends and family closer. Sometimes I wonder whether every person on your list even knows you exist or you know about them?
Take my own Facebook list. Two days ago while going through my list of ‘friends’ I discovered that I had four people on my list who had passed away, two of whom had died over a year ago. One had been in the news recently for the family first wanting her body exhumed and then rejecting the move. I didn’t even know she was on my page, till she died in mysterious circumstances. Two were students who had committed suicide. The fourth was a well known journalist for whom I had proofed a novel he had written. Why didn’t I delete them? Just too caught up in too many things, I guess, to even notice that they had migrated to another more heavenly social networking site. My fault entirely. And then that morning I got fed up of scrolling through the stuff posted by one of the 1278 people on my page, to look for something I was interested in. Which is what got me thinking.
Would anyone even notice if I dropped out of sight from their pages. I wondered how many would even notice or really care whether you’re there or not. At least the vast majority don’t. And in the last 48 hours I’ve proved it.
I deleted 800 people from my Facebook page on Tuesday morning. That left me with 478 friends.Today is Thursday and just one person – a student of a media institute where I no longer take lectures – messaged me to ask (demand), why I had inadvertently deleted her from my page. Nevertheless,, I explained why and her question was “but why me?” Needless to say she’s back on my list.
So this could mean one of two things. Either, they don’t really care for having me in their social network, or they haven’t even noticed I am missing. Which says a lot for ‘staying connected’!

  1. Kausik Ray says:

    Yeeeh, I am within 478 + 1. You have deleted 800, but my policy is reverse. My friendlist will never cross 800. Now I am encouraged after your action. I will ‘re-calibrate’ the target, may be 500.

    You are right. At least somebody called you in your case. When I deleted about 50 odd friends, none has even asked once, of those fortunate 50. If I delete 300, I hope somebody will ask , due to larger gamut.

    We worked just for 5 months together in Mohali, that also in completely different departments. Still you kept a lasting impression – that’s why I could find you even in your shorter first name in FB. Thank God, you are completely unchanged.

    Stay connected.

  2. BTW Mohan Sir, did you notice how many people have gone missing from your list? 😛 (some people deactivate FB altogether without getting noticed for various reasons) Sometimes social networking becomes a nuisance more than an aid.

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